Wednesday, December 28, 2011

This is primarily for my family members, and I hope it gets around to all the right people, because I'm tired of fighting everything I think I've been fighting. Or at least that which just dawned on me recently. I haven't ever gotten a particularly cordial reception from some sectors of my own family, and having thought a bit about how our family occasions go, (at least amongst the Klobucars, Tomacs, Babiches, etc,) attendance is normally pretty good for family reunions, funerals, and the like. You just kind of hit that "social wall" on occasions; all the people who don't really seem to want to talk to you for whatever reason...... and, admittedly, yes, I have always marched to the beat of a different drummer, that borders on a given. Neither of my marriages has been what you'd call entirely commonplace. No fault, really, of either of the brides, probably more just like the fact that there are some hyper-conservative members of the clan. Which is also not to say that none of THEM have skeletons in the closet, but generally speaking, that's beside the point. At any rate, In thinking about why my reception (and that of my spouses,) has been somewhat lukewarm, I realized a couple of things. 1) I'm the youngest of the cousins, until we get into another generation entirely. Nobody to relate to totally in that way. Okay, I can go with that, assuming it's the real deal. 2) As I mentioned before, I have always marched to the beat of my own drum. I understand if people find this a bit off-putting, but I've been working on my social self for quite a while now. Gimme a break, willya?! I'm tryin' here. 3) Most importantly, at least from my perspective, the guest list at both of my weddings was fairly small. Why? Because I've never been particularly WEALTHY, that's why! The first time around, we cut every break imaginable, and still pretty much barely had enough to make what DID happen proceed. Any more bodies invited would have broken us, right from the word go. When Martha and I got married, I suppose financially, more people on the guest list wouldn't have been impossible to swallow, however, given that I was working in Ohio at the time, and on top of that had to deal with Martha having a pacemaker put in three weeks before the wedding, any more people would have pretty much been a logistical nightmare the likes of which has not been seen since The Odyssey by Homer. So if any of this really rings true, and members of my family have felt slighted because they never got a wedding invitation, either time, I'M SORRY! TRULY! I'm only capable of so much, and a little slow on the uptake, to boot. Nothing has ever been meant as an intentional slight, if that's how it's been perceived, I'm just a man with distinct limitations. If that still doesn't suit you, sorry, there's nothing else I can possibly say. But reciprocally, neither of my mates has felt particularly good about the way they've been treated. and this is the only way I can think of to stand up for them, and their feelings. and what, by trickle-down effect, has happened to me. In the immortal words of Rodney King, "Can't we all just get along?!"

1 comment:

Pauline Loewenhardt said...

Hey Pete,

Why not be more direct and call or write to those in question.
Most family members don't read your blog