Somehow or other, a while back, my dad lost his hearing aid. And I can tell you, just from viewing the ensuing interaction between dad and my stepmother, it just wasn't good. Cheryl's a wonderful woman, and in terms of what she's been to dad for the last....almost 25 years now, I'm convinced there probably couldn't have been anyone else who'd have meant as much to him. But holy hell, when she's boiling, just stand back, and go get the mop, because what follows is NOT gonna be pretty. You've never seen a person that small make that much noise. And today, finally, dad got his hearing aid back. Cheryl says he's like a different person with it. (or without it, as the case may be,) but anyway, it prompted me to wonder just what it means to be able to hear, and have all your necessary physical componentry fully operational. No doubt, there are times when compromised sight or hearing can be played for a laugh, Mr. Magoo and Nancy Walker's character in "Murder By Death" come to mind, (She played a deaf cook to Truman Capote's deranged emcee for a murder; it's one of my favorite movies, with Peter Sellers, Peter Falk, David Niven, Elsa Lanchester, Alec Guinness and other notables, and really was a riot; worth the effort to find.) but closer to home, when part of somone you love shuts down, and the rest of the body is having a tough time compensating, when it takes a lot more patience with the other person just to get BOTH of you to the end of the day, well, the joke gets old, quick. Such was the case when dad didn't have his hearing aid. Nobody liked it, and for what it's worth, I can only hope my body never decides to turn on me in that fashion. Ask yourself what would be different if you could never see another sunset, or hear your child, or anyone else for that matter, talking to you. And then think about the way it would change how they saw you. Maybe. If you're inclined to run that risk, then there's a lot bigger risks you can afford, I guess. And expensive as I know it can be to keep yourself up at times, it's worth it in the end. Just try to envision my stepmother, trying desperately to keep her cool when dad doesn't have his hearing aid. Substitute anything more personal, if you like, but always keep in mind the risks you take, and the things you don't do, sometimes, don't exist in a vacuum.
EXCERPTED FROM AOL MENS. COM
AND THE FOLLOWING, SWEETHEART, I SWEAR I'LL TRY TO KEEP IN MIND.
Wife Support
When you add it all up — parent-teacher conferences, the leaky new Labrador puppy, stacks of bills — and then toss in the daily rigors of work, it's not surprising that your wife is ready for words by the time you both get home. In fact, a study conducted by researchers at Harvard University and the University of California at Berkeley found that after a stressful day, female spouses were more likely to instigate fights and alienate themselves from their partners. Instead of following suit, use these three simple steps to defuse her stress and prevent long-term havoc to your marriage.
Pick Up the Phone. Call her just to check in at least three times a day. "Talking releases a rush of dopamine and oxycotin (the 'reward' and 'bonding' neurochemicals) in a woman's brain," explains Louann Brisendine, M.D., author of The Female Brain and a neuropsychiatrist at the University of California at San Francisco. "It's the biggest neurological reward a woman can get besides an orgasm." First of all, this chemical reaction explains a great deal about women. Second, it gives you a powerful tool: A simple "I can't wait to see you tonight" is enough to distract her from the insanity of the day and reinforce the love circuits in her brain.
Have a Heart-to-Heart. Once a week, ask her how she's doing and if anything is bothering her, and listen. " Women report that the more their husbands talk to them the more satisfied they are in their marriages," says Dr. Brizendine. The reason? "Women use communication to navigate and ease the ups and downs of life," she says. Scheduling time to allow her to vent her frustrations is the key to preventing and resolving smaller problems before they escalate into larger issues.
Meet on Neutral Ground. If you know your wife is having a bad day at the office, warn the babysitter you'll be home late and take your wife out to dinner after work. "Taking household responsibilities off her mind is a good way to reduce her stress," says Cathy O'Neill, coauthor of Babyproofing Your Marriage, "and it allows you to spend quality alone-time together," two things experts say contribute to long-lasting intimacy.
Finally, I must needs take the New York Times to task, for an article that appeared in the Automotive section of last Sunday's edition. The article dealt with a New Yorker, a fellow who owns a 1967 Citroen DS19, and has apparently owned quite a number of older Citroens in his day. The article stated "Mr. Monteleone, who is gay, says he saw something of himself....." etc, etc......and going on to talk about the nature of someone who would ever contemplate owning, or admitting that there is anything even to be liked about, a Citroen. Admittedly, my best memory of a Citroen has to do with the 1963 ID19 that appeared in "Paris When it Sizzles," starring Audrey Hepburn, the black police model with the gigantic sunroof, almost amounting to a landaulet top, but what are we suggesting here, that you have to be a homosexual to appreciate a Citroen?! That is an utterly irresponsible thought. I have no doubts about my heterosexual nature, and yet Citroens fascinate and delight me in a lot of ways. As cars go, they are individual with a capital "I," and to equate individuality with necessarily being gay is just WRONG! More than that, it doesn't belong with "All the news that's fit to print;" or at least put the article in the right place, like on the editorial page, not the Automotive section. So, shame on you, NYT, for an irresponsible journalistic act in suggesting such a thing.

Click here to see the "Paris When it Sizzles" Citroen I'm talking about.
http://www.imcdb.org/vehicle_76098-Citroen-ID-19-1963.html?PHPSESSID=7066adf9a8c79830489e575888d66581

Even as Citroens go, I myself like the mid-70s "SM" models, with the Maserati-made, Weber-carburated V-6 engine, although I've heard they're just a raging pain to own, assuming any still exist. None the less, as suggestions go, I think the one that the Times is giving us is just plain improper.