Personal growth has been the challenge from the outset, and I feel like I've made a lot fo headway, actually, but for the benefit of many of those reading here, who face the challenge of how to help a young person succeed, this is for you. The most important thing I've read lately was actually a Raplh Waldo Emerson quote that appeared in one of the textbooks I use in class. It said that nothing great was ever accomplished without enthusiasm, and I couldn't agree more. But, of course, car guy that I am, I pay attention to a lot of things, including Pirelli tire ads, even if I never would buy Pirelli tires. Pirelli's slogan for a while now has been "Power is nothing without control," which I agree with just as much as I do Mr. Emerson. So, parents, here it is; first of all, presume that your kids are going to make mistakes, and don't get upset when they do. And you're the experienced hand, much as they want to do it on their own, and even if they've tried, help them be better. When they reach a point where they haven't succeeded at something they've been trying to, don't point them off in a completely different direction without doing everything you can to try and help them be better at what they love to do. And if they don't KNOW what they love to do, well, that's the time to REALLY get involved. Everything, somewhere along the line, exists at an absolutely simple level, from English literature to architecture. Books in libraries are free, and there ARE books out there, believe it or not, that bring Shakespeare down to a child's level; my oldest daughter owns a good version of that I bought for her, and started out liking Romeo and Juliet best, now she's moved on to the version of Hamlet. (SHUDDER....) And if I had a child who was a budding architect, and didn't have much money, remember that craft stores usually keep packages of popsicle sticks on hand, and other relatively simple stuff that would help any child. The entreprenurial sorts can start with a paper route, lemonade stand, or washing cars in people's driveways, all of which I did growing up. And the best thing you can say to a child who's frustrated, or may have failed at something is, "I like the fact that you've tried, that's really good. Shall we see if we can figure it out together?" For all I say, of course, kids can even frustrate me, I admit it. But what matters as much then is that you keep YOURSELF under control. Take the example of places designed for kids, and INVOLVE them in learning for themselves. In my classes, I can actually have kids literally HANGING from me, DYING to give me an answer, when I say, "give me a word that starts with V." or Z, or whatever today's letter might be. And, at least in this culture, kids will tell you more about what they know before they EVER, and I mean EVER, tell you how they really feel. Which sucks, in a way, because it makes it REALLY hard to find out what might be bothering a child, but if it's just the fact that YOU'RE unfamiliar, then hopefully they'll come around and warm up to you. Most of my kids seem to have, if they wanted to, although I have a few who are simply there to socialize, and when I'm there to teach, it can be a real battle. Which brings me to the next point of mine, which is to say that peer group is everything; kids will be completely different if you put them in, or take them out of their circle of friends. It's universal, trust me, and they won't like YOU any better if you take them away from their friends, but if you're working at cross purposes, sometimes you just have to be the grown-up. One of the other biggies is watching the way your child plays; do they paint? do they write? are they organized, or is it more "free form," so to speak? And as I was looking at the news today, I came across a feature about the #1 skill kids need to have for success in college, and it said it was the ability to handle complex reading. This finding is the result of a new study from ACT, which says that the ability to read complex material, which it categorizes as that in which the interaction between characters or ideas may be subtle instead of obvious. It also says that high school reading standards NEED to be higher. Of course, even if they aren't higher anytime soon, that doesn't prevent YOU from taking charge as the parent, now does it? I thought not.