Has it been that long?! Yes, indeed, it's been 30 years since I graduated from high school. In what seems like a flash, I already have one of my children who has done the same. un-freaking-believable. If you missed some of those 30 years, and indeed, many probably have, especially if you haven't been keeping up on Facebook or Twitter, here's the recap; I have two daughters, Sydne and Shelby, who I love dearly, but who haven't spoken to me, for whatever reason in years. I suspect they might at some point, but at this point I just feel good being happy in my own skin. My ex-wife, Lisa, kicked me to the curb in 2003, and frankly....no great loss. I loved her at some point, but the truth is, I never would have met Martha had I not been single again. THAT, as it turns out, would have been a great loss. Martha has put many, many, more than I can count sometimes, songs in my heart. She understands my jokes. And even if it is not necessarily her nature, she has grown to love my cars, sanctioned one of the greatest experiences of my life (teaching in Korea, which changed my life indelibly,) and has pounded more dents out of my weary soul than you can imagine. In short, Martha has repainted my entire universe. Well......Martha and another dear friend of mine from the immediate post-Lisa period named Ge-Anne Bowdoin, who managed to get my soul running again. Ge-Anne lives in Georgia, and there was a period during which...well...it was a tough call about what to do with my life. In case you were wondering why my Facebook profile picture was a Phoenix for a while, hopefully now you understand a little better. And maybe only the guys will understand this, but...well...we as guys have all seen cars with so much motor that we thought to ourselves, "man, if that thing ever hooked up all the way, it would snap in half!" Which I guess is how I really feel some days. So blowing a little smoke is okay, if it keeps you from breaking in half. Which, by any standard, is bad. Who the hell knows where I've been?! Hell, I don't even know some days. It has taken a lot of noise, smoke, heartache and disaster to get to where I am today, but the plain fact is....I'M HERE. And I am probably better than I have ever been before, even if am excruciatingly weary. Many days, many miles, many gains, many losses...many discoveries, but a vastly improved overall state of affairs for me personally. Hopefully, I can keep this going for as long as humanly possible, and then die, totally spent, with little more than a smile on my face nothing could possibly erase. I agonize over if the dementia that has plagued a father I didn't know as a man for nearly long enough, is headed my way. I would wish more than anything to just die with my wits about me. If that means not living to be 90, so be it. I have herein cleared a great deal out of my soul, and God knows I will never make everyone happy. But starting with me being happy, and hoping there's enough time to get some more accomplishments in....I'd say that's pretty good, no?